1) i ran out of milk, so i couldn't make coffee. so now I'm drinking espresso
2) a 10 year old kid was pan handling and ask me for change, i said all i had was debit....i lied.
3) I don't look for cars on king street, i just cross.
4) The look of babies gums when they frantically cry annoys me
5) I can't sleep at night anymore...for about a year to be exact. Now I'm comfortable with 5 hours of interrupted sleep
6) violence on the big screen draws me in, Samuel l. Jackson has way to many movies
7) my Ginnie pig was supposedly in love with a girl in Toronto. we mailed him there. That asshole never writes!
8) i use to have 2 dogs named trex and princess....Guess which one i named?
9) If a tree falls in the woods, val kilmer will hear it
10) when you are calling from a business, about a consumer issue..it confuses call centers
11) those Interactive Voice Recognition girls don't like me.
12) paper clips have way too much work involved in them to be that cheap
13) cereal killers (ones that finish a box off in one sitting) and serial killers have alot in common.
14) that is what she said
15) does anyone remember "lion heart"? ............ KICK ASS!
16) i love getting mail. I hate getting faxes
17) we had a squirrel infestation, so i shot one, to teach them a lesson. i was never the same
18) i once ignited my microwave on fire during a fantastic art making session... don't ever tell a terrorist but crayons + wax paper + plus microwaves = BOMB!!!!!
19) I don't negotiate with terrorist
20) what if i had just got paid.....would i have given money to the kid then??
21) plagiarism is the cornerstone of todays journalism
21) plagiarism is the cornerstone of todays journalism
23) Does a bear shit in the woods??? no the excrete in the stream!
24) my generation is getting old! DAMN KIDS THESE DAYS!
25) magic mushrooms do not require tinker bell to be awesome...Just cow shit
26) Primary Colors are kick ass....... Sorry Steve
28) Don't go chasing waterfalls...stick to the rivers and the lakes that your use to!
29) If Steve asks you what color the light is, dont ever say blinking yellow!
30) When i was a young boy i wanted to be a lawyer, judge and a cop....wow that would make a great movie, with alot of thrills!
31) If i was on "step by step", i actually wouldnt be on the show, cause i would still be on that rollercoaster!
32) Here at HHP, we have 4 scanners..........WHY?
33) To have Spidermans power in saint john would SUCK!
34) I have a Iphone....Kinda big deal
35) I have finished the internet 9 times
36) people often ask me what my favorite book is. I reply "I don't read....I narrate".
37) when playing blackjack i can get 21 with only 1 card.
38) I invented a a new Vowel....unfortunatly i cant tell it to you cause its not on this keyboard.
39)
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